This Week the Trend

There is a finite amount of words that rhyme with trend, so we're going to have to do a bit of rearranging.

The trend this week
Was to give up on my self-critique,
To find myself smiling from cheek to cheek
and realize that the future isn't quite so bleak

The trend this week
Was to give my poor attitude a major tweak
More free time and some optimism helped me see
That content is the thing I always wanna be

So I had a good week this week.  I still found myself frustrated at some things, but I had a different fix rather than staying frustrated.  I took advantage of introvert time and really took advantage of my ability to sleep in this week and relax a bunch.  Because classes ended last Wednesday, I admit that it was very easy to feel content this week.  I had fewer responsibilities and more time to do the things I actually enjoy.  Vacation from school usually makes me wish that every week was like this rather than enjoying this time for what it is: a temporary break.  In other words, I hope this time of easy contentment is a warm up for my contentment muscles.  I hope I can strengthen them to prepare for when it's more difficult to feel content.

Last week, my life was out of control in the bad way: neither God or I had control.  There is also a bad way to feel in control: feeling like you can handle things on your own.  This week, though, I think I found the balance.  Mainly since I had a lot fewer things on my to-do lists this week, I felt like I could handle my life for the first time in a while.  But whether I can handle it or not, the balance is that I still want God to help me handle it.  That's where I think contentment is.  Whether I think I can do life on my own or not, whether I am happy about the way my day to day is going or not, I want God in the middle of it.  And when He is, there is nothing to fear, nothing to worry about, nothing to not be joyful about.